Sunday, June 28, 2020

The Crusade - Trivium

Guys, sincere apologies for letting another week go by between posts. It seems my brain has been rather preoccupied of late, as it has been littered with questions. Now those questions are answered, and I can finally share with all of you. But before I do, consider the following:

-What if Metallica learned how to sing harmonies?

-What if Metallica had a drummer that didn't suck?

-What if Trans-Siberian Orchestra's album artwork was drawn by Frank Frazetta?
(For those of you who are about to Google search Frank Frazetta, let me save you the time - he was the artist that did all the Molly Hatchet album covers. Free history lesson, courtesy of Synic Spins.)

-What if James Hetfield was Asian?

Maybe that last one wasn't entirely necessary, but ladies and gentlemen have no fear, for your hero Synic has the answer.

Trivium.

These guys are an established and well-known band who have been around for over 20 years now, if you can believe that. And one of their biggest fans, someone near and dear to my own heart, asked me to review one of their albums. And after getting 3 songs into their record Ascendancy, she said "WAIT! Do The Crusade instead! But also review this one song from Ascendancy!"
Well... ok, why not.

2 minutes into "Ignition," the first track on the record, I texted the girl that requested this album saying "These guys are like if Metallica did a duet with Mushroomhead." I also found myself thinking that if the SAW movie franchise was a song, it would be this. And now that I've heard the whole album, my thoughts have not changed. (Whether that statement is good or bad is dependent on your opinion of the SAW movies, I suppose.) Though this album is drastically different from the 3 tracks of Ascendancy that I heard, so maybe they were still finding themselves at this point? I don't know, that's something you'd have to ask the girl that requested this album, or another fan of the band.

She specifically requested I sink my teeth into "Pull Harder On The Strings Of Your Martyr" from Ascendancy, so here we go. It's really a good thing this blog doesn't give me a character limit in these posts, cause God dammit that song title is really a novel to write. Anyway, the song itself is as I expected. a badass riff, screamed lyrics, and a chorus featuring actual singing, and even some harmonies. That said, the chorus was my favorite part of the whole song. It took me back to a long time ago when she showed me that song for the first time. It was strange to me then, but vaguely familiar to me now.

Me and speed metal, or thrash, whichever you prefer to call it (I'm not big on semantics), we are not friends. You can name countless speed metal bands and I will turn my nose up at all of them. So keeping that in mind, I will be as objective as possible here.

Lyrically, these guys are more than brilliant. Some of their song titles and use of SAT-words remind me of a metal Bad Religion. Which, in black and white sounds pretty awesome, doesn't it? Building off that - their song "The Rising" was punk as hell. Watch the music video for it if you don't believe me. The sound isn't punk, but the spirit is there.

Musically, they are more than solid. Each track has another killer riff that is more than enough to melt your face off. Their solos are a little technical for my taste, but with today's metal formula where every track needs its own solo, I guess it's just the nature of the beast. So I won't fault them too much for that.

So at the end of the day, will I ever listen to this whole record again? No. Probably not. (Sorry, Kim)
However, did I hate every second of listening to it? No. No I didn't. In fact, I promised Kim long ago that if Trivium ever toured with a band I liked, I would go see them with her. And after actually listening to some of this band's material, I stand by that promise. I don't think I'll hate it.

My closing thoughts are that the album's finale and title-track, the 8+ minute long instrumental, sounds like what you would hear in the elevator down to Hell.

The Crusade (album) - Wikipedia

The Crusade - Trivium
10 - 10 - 2006

1. Ignition
2. Detonation
3. Entrance of the Conflagration
4. Anthem (We Are the Fire)
5. Unrepentant
6. And Sadness Will Sear
7. Becoming the Dragon
8. To The Rats
9. This World Can't Tear Us Apart
10. Tread The Floods
11. Contempt Breeds Contamination
12. The Rising
13. The Crusade

Favorite Track: The Rising
Least Favorite Track: Ignition
Rating: 7.2

Sunday, June 21, 2020

Synic's Top Ten: An Ever-changing List

All over social media in the past few weeks, aside from the end of the world conspiracies, racism, and general political bullshit, people have been challenging their friends to post their top ten albums that inspired their musical tastes. While these posts are typically limited to one album a day, I thought I might put my current top ten into a single post, as my favorite albums are constantly changing. Sure, the top 3-5 are pretty much always locked, but albums 7-10 change depending on whatever my current obsession may be. So maybe I'll do a post like this once a year, maybe I won't. Stay tuned. It's also worth noting that after #5 these albums are in no specific order. Enjoy.

Anyway, here we go:

Poodle Hat - Wikipedia

1. Poodle Hat - "Weird Al" Yankovic

While this may not be my favorite record "Weird Al" has come out with, (second favorite, if you were curious) this album belongs as the first on the list because it is the first concert I ever attended. And you never forget your first. My life was forever changed that night, as I am a concert fiend now and go to as many as I can every year. Al has been the keystone in forming who I am musically ever since I was young, and for that I am eternally grateful.
See also: Running With Scissors, Mandatory Fun

AC/DC - Powerage - Amazon.com Music

2. Powerage - AC/DC

Followers of my Twitter account may have probably guessed this gem would be next. AC/DC has been my all-time favorite band for a long time now, as many of my family and friends could easily attest. Many listeners of classic-rock radio may or may not be fans of AC/DC because they claim "all their songs sound the same." well to some extent that may be true of their records produced since the late 80's, people who make this claim have certainly never heard Powerage in it's entirety. In fact, many casual fans of the band (and certainly most haters) probably wouldn't recognize a single track on this album, with it's most-known song being "Sin City." Did you know it without Googling it first? This record was the second to last to come from beloved frontman Bon Scott, and it is the record of choice for many hardcore fans because it is the most underplayed and diverse record of their entire discography. This is one you need in your collection.
See Also: Let There Be Rock, Highway To Hell, Back In Black, For Those About To Rock, Flick Of The Switch, Black Ice, Rock Or Bust
Actually, fuck it. Just listen to all of their albums, okay?

FOR UNLAWFUL CARNAL KNOWLEDGE(reissue)

3. For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge - Van Halen

F.U.C.K. was the third record Van Halen released with Sammy Hagar on the mic. It was also the first "Van Hagar" record to feature a return to their classic guitar-heavy sound, and they took a step away from the keyboard-driven love songs. Every track on this album is a rocker, with the exception of instrumental "316." Eight of the songs on this album would easily go on my "Van Halen Favorites" playlist if I ever made one.
See also: Van Halen, Fair Warning, Balance, Van Halen III

Conspiracy Of One

4. Conspiracy Of One - The Offspring

This album is the one I blame (or rather thank) for my love of punk music. While post-1994 Offspring may have become too-pop-to-be-punk but too-rock-to-be-pop, this is the album that started it all for me. There is not one skippable song on this record. In fact, the first favorite song I ever had (that wasn't a Weird Al song) was "Original Prankster," track 3 on this masterpiece. I could go on forever about this record, but I still have 6 more to go.
See also: Ignition, Americana, Splinter

Disturbed - Ten Thousand Fists (2LP) - Amazon.com Music

5. Ten Thousand Fists - Disturbed

One of those bands that people either love or hate. Frankly, I will never understand the hate this band gets. Musically, they kick ass. This band is the reason I became a fan of metal in the first place. They have a tremendous rhythm section in drummer Mike Wengren and bassist John Moyer. Then comes one of the best riff-masters in the business, Dan Donegan. To cap it off is one of my favorite male vocalists of all time, David Draiman. He's also one of my favorite lyricists of all time. If I ever got the opportunity to meet these men, I would probably gush until my heart stopped and I threw up all over their shoes. So why this record of their entire catalogue? Listen to personal favorites "Overburdened" and "Sons of Plunder" and maybe you'll get it. I also must mention that I still favor their version of "Land of Confusion" over their "Sound of Silence" cover.
See also: The Lost Children, Evolution

Halestorm - The Strange Case of... - Amazon.com Music

6. The Strange Case Of... - Halestorm

For many bands the sophomore record far underperforms the debut record. This is a widely-feared phenomenon in the music industry. However, Halestorm dodged that bullet with Strange Case by winning their first grammy for opening track "Love Bites (So Do I)." The radio hit "I Miss The Misery" also went platinum just last summer, which is a truly impressive feat when you consider how many streams you have to get to equal a sale. Seriously, check out the numbers sometime. It might make you reconsider how you consume your music. It's also worth mentioning that the track "Mz. Hyde" was the Halestorm song that won me over as a fan in the first place, not that that is anywhere near impressive as a Grammy or a platinum single.
See also: Halestorm, Into The Wild Life, Vicious

In Step - Wikipedia

7. In Step - Stevie Ray Vaughan & Double Trouble

The last record SRV would release during his lifetime, and in my opinion, his best. The strong opener "The House is Rockin'" is immediately followed by my two favorite SRV tracks "Crossfire" and "Tightrope," and the killer tracks do not stop there. This is another record that I can sit through in its entirety without the temptation of skipping even a single track. In fact, I nearly cry when I listen to it because I know I will never have the opportunity to see this man perform live, nor ever hear any new material from him and his band. His sudden early death was a true tragedy to his family, music, and the world.
See also: Texas Flood, Couldn't Stand The Weather

Screaming for Vengeance

8. Screaming For Vengeance - Judas Priest

I feel this album needs no introduction or justification. I love metal, and Priest has another one of my favorite male vocalists of all time, Rob Halford. The man is often referred to as the Metal God, so need I say more?
See also: Rocka Rolla, British Steel, Nostradamus, Firepower

Slave to the Grind [Clean version]

9. Slave To The Grind - Skid Row

Skid Row is another band that dodged the sophomore-record-flop curse. In fact, I believe their smash-hit debut record (featuring all their radio hits) was actually them creating a name for themselves before finding their true sound. This album was, and is, their heaviest and angriest record to date, and in my opinion, their best. Sebastian Bach cemented himself on this album as one of the great voices in hair metal. Opening tracks "Monkey Business" and "Slave To The Grind" are like a one-two punch that just tells you right away "I Remember You" was pussy shit compared to what you're about to hear.
See also: Skid Row, B-Side Ourselves

FIVE FINGER DEATH PUNCH - F8 - Amazon.com Music

10. F8 - Five Finger Death Punch

This album is very special to me, as it was the first record reviewed on this blog. It was the album that made me want to review music in the first place. I said in that review that it damn well might be my pick for metal record of the year, and with COVID delaying anything and everything, the competition hasn't exactly been all that stiff. I don't know what to say about this album that I didn't already say, so I'll leave it here. I fuckin love you, Ivan Moody.
See also: War Is The Answer, The Wrong Side Of Heaven And The Righteous Side Of Hell

Honorable Mentions & Current Obsessions:
Enter: The Conquering Chicken - The Gits
Sinner - Joan Jett & The Blackhearts
Scatter The Rats - L7
The Interrupters - The Interrupters
Scarecrow - John Cougar Mellencamp
Hold Your Fire - Firehouse
Ritual - In This Moment
Night Songs - Cinderella
Rub My Mind - Barb Wire Dolls
Light Me Up - The Pretty Reckless

Tuesday, June 16, 2020

Synic's Spotlight: Fight The Good Fight - The Interrupters

Has it really been a week since my last post? Man, where does the time go? Really? The past week flew by for me. Partially because I've been horribly busy with things less important to me than music and this blog, and partially because a friend introduced me to a new band that I have been listening to nonstop since their first note resonated through my eardrums. The Interrupters. For fans of punk, rock, ska, jazz, pop, look no further. These guys (and girl) have it all.

This group only has three albums to date, and what a great trilogy those albums make. Their sound does not waiver from record to record in the slightest, with the newer record sounding just like a continuation of its predecessor. That's why it was hard for me to decide which of the three I wanted to discuss. While I do love debut records, I figured I should try to keep things as relevant as possible and look at their newest effort: Fight The Good Fight. Released in 2018, this record has everything fans new and old loved about the previous two records. Fun riffs, jazzy horns, popping percussion, and catchy lyrics with anthemic choruses. (I also learned while writing this that the record will be celebrating it's second birthday in a couple weeks.)

While listening to the album as I write this, I find myself thinking that it will be difficult to pick a favorite and least favorite track. In many ways, keeping your sound consistent is very much appreciated by fans, in that if you like one song, you like them all. (I.E. me and AC/DC.) However, it works great until it doesn't work, for those of you out there with questionable music taste that DON'T like AC/DC, the fact that all of their songs sound the same may be annoying or even agitating. And I get that. To some degree, that can be said here for The Interrupters. However, since their debut record only came into the world 4 years prior to their 3rd studio effort, maybe it's simply too early in their career to say they will never change. I think we have a lot yet to hear from The Interrupters, and whether they evolve or stay the same, I'm excited to come along for the ride.

As for my decision of my favorite and least favorite tracks, it will come down to simply which riff makes me feel like dancing the most. (And I hate dancing unless I drink first.) That, combined with which has the most unique lyrics of the rest and which repeats the chorus the most. To me, repeating a chorus over and over again with very short or no verses, is just lazy songwriting. It's either filler, or simply written to be a drunk karaoke bar hit. Either way, this decision will be tough for me this time, as the whole record, hell, the band's entire discography, is just fuckin' fun. When the world reopens and concerts exist again, find me in the audience at one of their shows.

EDIT: My "Favorite Track" decision ultimately boiled down to which song sounded most likely to be in a Tony Hawk game. Go ahead and listen to this album and tell me it DOESN'T make you wanna do a McTwist over a helicopter.

INTERRUPTERS - Fight the Good Fight - Amazon.com Music

Fight The Good Fight - The Interrupters
6 - 29 - 2018

1. Title Holder
2. So Wrong
3. She's Kerosene
4. Leap of Faith
5. Got Each Other (feat. Rancid)
6. Broken World
7. Gave You Everything
8. Not Personal
9. Outrage
10. Rumors and Gossip
11. Be Gone
12. Room with a View

Favorite Track: She's Kerosene
Least Favorite Track: Leap of Faith

Tuesday, June 9, 2020

Synic's Spotlight: Volume II - September Mourning

This is something truly special. This is a record that I've been listening to like it's my goddamn job for months now, but it never occurred to me to write about it until now. This week, the spotlight shines brightly on Volume II, the confusingly-titled first full-length LP from pop-metal group September Mourning.

Let me say, that these guys are way too damn good for you to not know who they are. (Unless you do know who they are, in which case I wish you had told me about them a long time ago.) Their sound and stage presence reminds me a lot of In This Moment, but frontwoman September (by day known as Emily Lazar) brings something entirely different to the table. She quite literally transforms herself into the character of September on stage every night. And when I say character, I (again quite literally) mean character. For Emily Lazar also has her own comic out by the title of September Mourning, in which she herself is the main character. If this group ever finds big mainstream success like they deserve, with their genius marketing they could be as widespread and well-known as KISS. Though hopefully less greedy and generally awful.

Now when I say their sound is similar to that of ITM, what I mean is the heavy instrumentation and driving rhythm section. To some degree, September's vocal style is also similar to Maria Brink's, but with less variation in technique and range. Not that that is a bad thing, though, as not everyone likes screaming. So I guess what I would say is, September Mourning's brand of pop-metal is a more palatable metal for those of you out there who aren't really metal fans. And for those of you out there who still think that metal is "just angry" or "scary," grow up.

In short, September Mourning is definitely a group worth checking out if you're looking for something new to get into. And when you find the time, I highly recommend checking out their comic book and live videos of the group on stage. Then maybe you'll get bitten by the bug like I did.

Vol. 2 | September Mourning CD | EMP

Volume II - September Mourning
7 - 29 - 2016

1. The Collection
2. Angels To Dust
3. Eye Of The Storm
4. Before The Fall
5. Children Of Fate
6. Skin And Bones
7. 20 Below
8. Heart Can Hold
9. Superhuman
10. Live Like You're Alive
11. Stand By Me
12. 'Til You See Heaven

Favorite Track: Superhuman
Least Favorite Track: Stand By Me

Thursday, June 4, 2020

Synic Selects Vol. III - Black Artists Matter

Hey guys. I'm sorry I've been on a bit of a hiatus lately, I've been preoccupied with other things. But the good news is, I'm back up and running. I wanted to use this grand return to the blogosphere in order to shed some light on the centuries-old issue that has been sweeping our country lately. I thought, or was hoping, that we as a species would have grown past violence and racism, but sadly, here we are. So I am here tonight to tell you, that wherever you stand on the Black Lives Matter movement, we are all the same underneath the skin.

Colors aside, another thing we all have in common is music. Whatever genre is your go-to, there is no denying that it wouldn't be what it was today if not for rock n roll. And rock n roll, (here's a free history lesson for you guys) is the lovechild of R&B, blues, and a sprinkling of rockabilly. And who were the pioneers of these genres, you ask? Slaves. And later on came the freemen offspring of those slaves. Eventually, a ways down the road, the blues got a little edgier, and gained a new attitude and affliction with sex and drugs.

Truth be told, I had a different plan in mind for Synic Selects Vol. III but in light of recent events, I decided Vol. III should come early this month and I came up with an all new track list for it. So the new theme of Synic Selects Vol. III is now Black Artists Matter, and we will be celebrating some of the heavy hitters of black rock artists. Granted this is not an all-inclusive list, as there are many others out there that may not be represented here. So feel free to add your own to the mix. This isn't MY mix, it's everyone's.

Synic Selects Vol. III - Black Artists Matter

1. Star Spangled Banner - Jimi Hendrix
2. Roll Over Beethoven - Chuck Berry
3. Tutti Frutti - Little Richard
4. Proud Mary - Tina Turner
5. Purple Rain - Prince
6. Soul Man - Sam & Dave
7. Are You Gonna Go My Way - Lenny Kravitz
8. Dancing in the Moonlight - Thin Lizzy
9. Hold My Hand - Hootie & The Blowfish
10. Let It Whip - Dazz Band
11. Electric Avenue - Eddy Grant
12. Heard It Through The Grapevine - Marvin Gaye
13. Pick A Bale Of Cotton - Leadbelly
14. A Change Is Gonna Come - Aretha Franklin
15. Ebony & Ivory - Stevie Wonder & Paul McCartney
16. War - Edwin Starr
17. Cult Of Personality - Living Colour

BONUS: Sweet Child O' Mine - Guns N' Roses
*(Slash is half African-American)

Monday, May 25, 2020

The Mighty Van Halen Debate - Synic's Final Word

It has certainly come out to my readers by now that I love Van Halen. They're a band that transformed arena-rock, inspired countless glam-metal bands, and they continue to inspire to this day. It's no secret to my family and friends that I love talking about all things Van Halen, but the one question I hate being asked is "Van Halen or Van Hagar?" It drives me crazy that every day my Twitter feed is flooded with Roth fans shitting on Hagar, or Hagar fans shitting on Dave. The reality of the situation is, "Van Hagar" never existed. It is just the annoying and demeaning moniker that some so-called "fans" of the group gave the band after Diamond Dave left to pursue his solo career. One of the questions I WISH people would ask me is, "How do you feel about Van Cherone?" I bet many of you don't even know what I'm talking about. That's because Van Halen 3 is one of the most forgotten-about records in rock and roll history. Many current fans don't even realize that there was in fact a third singer for Van Halen in the late 90s. So when people ask me if I'm a Sammy or Dave fan, I tell them this: I'm a VAN HALEN fan. 3 singers, 3 sounds, 1 band. I'm a fan of all of it. Any time Eddie, Alex, and Mikey put new grooves in a vinyl disk, I was a buyer and a fan. In this breakdown, I'll talk about the strengths and weaknesses of each era of Van Halen, and give my final remarks at the end. So strap in and get ready.

Van Halen Phase 1: The Roth Years
Van Halen Phase 1 is some of the strongest, most inspirational, most inventive, most recognizable material in rock and roll. The list of hits is seemingly endless. The band's only #1 hit "Jump" would also come from the last of 6 records during this era. I could go on for a long time about the greatness of their debut record, or you can refer to my earlier post comparing Van Halen to Appetite for Destruction for my full analysis.

The first six records from Van Halen are a true treasure. Eddie Van Halen forever changed the guitar world with his incredible skill and unique techniques. The band's frontman, David Lee Roth, would become a rock icon. Not for his incredible voice, but rather his unforgettable showmanship. He was the perfect frontman, the girls in the crowd wanted him, and the boys wanted to BE him. What Roth had in showmanship, however, he lacked in talent. He could run, jump, and dance on stage like no one else, but he couldn't sing. In fact, early in the backyard party days of Van Halen, the brothers Eddie and Alex didn't even want Dave in the band because he sounded so bad. He could only sort of play guitar, but he couldn't sing. What he could do, however, was write great lyrics. (He also had a PA system that the boys desperately needed, as Dave came from a rich family and the brothers came from an immigrant family...) Another shortcoming Dave had was actually with his brilliant lyrics. On stage, he would often forget them. While he may play it off like a big joke, it's insanely unprofessional and the fans don't appreciate that.

So, in short, Dave could perform, and he could write. But he can't sing, and he can't remember his own lyrics.

Van Halen Phase 2: The Hagar Years
This era of Van Halen is easily the second-most talked about tenure for the band. And why shouldn't it be? They put out a string of hits, all on 4 records, each hitting #1 on the charts. It was a massively successful time for the group, even though many Roth fans would hate to admit it. When the Red Rocker stepped into the group, it was like a match made in heaven. In fact, the pairing had been in the works, more or less, since the beginning. Eddie and Alex were big fans of the Hagar-fronted band Montrose, and while they were recording their debut record, they handed producer Ted Templeman a copy of Montrose's debut record and said "Make us sound like this." There is even an audio recording out there somewhere of Van Halen (with Roth) covering a Montrose song at one of their famous backyard parties. Later on in Phase 1, Templeman tried convincing the brothers VH that Roth was holding them back, and they should give Sammy a call. Montrose had broken up, and Sammy was out on his own. It sounded good, but the time wasn't right.

When Sammy finally came in, after getting his car fixed by Eddie's mechanic, it was the pairing everyone had been waiting for. Sam could do it all, he could write, sing, perform, and he could play the hell out of a guitar. Just imagine, a guitar-focused band like Van Halen with dueling guitars. Guitar-God Eddie facing off with the newcomer Red Rocker. Would've been amazing. And was it? Well, yes, but not for the reason we were hoping for. Come mid-to-late 80s, Eddie discovered the keyboards, and began experimenting and writing with 88 keys instead of 6 strings. This transition to keys caused Van Halen with Sammy Hagar to start generating hits that were all focused on sex and love, which made many fans believe that Van Halen were getting soft, while others continued to love the new material. The change in tone of the band cause many fans to leave, and many new fans to come in, after all, Hagar had his own fanbase that he brought with him after his successful time with Montrose and massively successful stretch as a solo artist. For many years, Van Halen with Sammy would play some of his solo hits, such as "I Can't Drive 55" and "One Way to Rock" at their live shows. He would also include a solo acoustic performance of either "Give To Live" or "Eagles Fly."

With Hagar, the band found themselves a guy who could actually sing. His lyrics were a little weaker, and the band lost their edgy attitude, but that may not be entirely Sam's fault. He wrote and sang along with the music he was given, it's not his fault if Guitar-God Eddie wanted to play keyboards instead.

Van Halen Phase 3: Cherone and The Beginning of The End
I couldn't exactly call this The Cherone Years, as he was only with the group for one album, so this section will be the longest, but theres a lot of shit to cover here.

Somewhere around '96-'97 marked the unfortunate end of the Hagar run of Van Halen. Whether you believe Eddie or Sammy as to how the ending came to be, if he was fired or if he quit, is merely inconsequential. At the end of the day, Sam was gone, but Van Halen wanted to keep going. They needed a new singer. Roth and Hagar were both out of the picture, so they needed someone new.

Enter Gary Cherone.

Van Halen only recorded 1 record with Gary, and it is easily one of the most ignored records in rock and roll. But why? It doesn't deserve that at all. It came at a bad time, maybe, as rock and roll was struggling in the late 90s. Glam-metal was long dead, grunge was still somewhat big, and many of the big-name acts from the 70s and 80s were having a hard time with the late 90s and early 00s. Van Halen were no different. Van Halen 3 came in 1998, and a massive world tour followed. Was is successful? No. Should it have been? Yes. Here's why: Cherone had everything the band needed. He could perform, he could write, and he could sing. The setlist from their '98 tour was stacked with hits from all 3 phases of the band. He sand the hell out of Roth tunes "Mean Street," "Unchained," and more, and he nailed them. He hit Hagar favorites such as "Right Now," and "Why Can't This Be Love," and nailed those too. Then of course he sang his own material, like "Without You," and "Fire in the Hole" and naturally knocked them out of the park. The sad truth of it is, by this point, no one cared. After 2 beloved frontmen left the band, no one wanted a third. I feel bad for Gary Cherone for this reason. VH3 was, in the brother's eyes, a failure. After the string of #1 albums they had just celebrated, VH3 fell tragically short. But what I will say, is that the failure of VH3 is not Gary's fault. It was a great rock record. Maybe it wasn't a great Van Halen record, but it was a great rock record nonetheless. Maybe had the band toured with Gary before the record came out, things would have been different. It's hard to say.

To boil it down, I love Gary Cherone. He was the best possible choice for a doomed Van Halen in the late 90s. He could write, sing, and perform, and that was exactly what they needed to stay afloat. Sadly, the VH goose was cooked before Gary even stepped in.

This officially marks the end of all listenable material to come from Van Halen. It is my belief that Van Halen committed suicide in 1999 in their home in California. Maybe they couldn't handle the pressure of finding a 4th singer, maybe they were afraid of Y2K. I don't know for sure, I just know that it was over before the change of the century.

Since Gary left the band, they had done reunions with both Dave and Sam, generated 2 greatest hits packages, (both of which contain no Cherone songs whatsoever) and recorded some new songs with each of the first two frontmen. Dave came in for "Me Wise Magic" and "Can't Get This Stuff No More," which are two songs that many fans actually seem to like, though I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because many Dave fans are too stubborn to admit that he sucks now? I don't know. I bet that if Sam or Gary sang these songs instead, no one would like them at all. Think about it. The truth is, Dave sings like absolute shit on these tracks. When he tries to hit that signature squeal that he always did on early records, he sounds like a cat that was hit by a lawnmower. Hang it up, Dave. It's embarrassing.

Sam came in to record "Up For Breakfast," "It's About Time," and "Learning To See," all of which are absolutely awful. I will admit, I know all the words to "Breakfast" because I thought it was catchy and fun when I first heard it, but after the 3rd or 4th time of hearing Sam sing about morning wood and getting off first thing after waking up, I got pretty tired of it. Like I said before, he couldn't write like Dave could. His metaphors are just weak and he makes the same ones over and over again. Love you Sam, but not for these 3 songs.

Finally, Dave came back in for the new record that no one asked for. A Different Kind of Truth landed in 2012 with David Lee Roth on vocals, and Eddie Van Halen's son Wolfgang on bass guitar. I will now say that this is the only Van Halen record that I refuse to listen to. It's simply just awful. Truly unforgivably awful. It contains recycled riffs from the early 80s, meaning the guitarwork and drums are the only listenable components of this record. Dave's lyrics are tragically weak, and his lyrics were always his strength. (He also can't dance or perform live like he used to, so seeing their live show just isn't the same anymore either.) His voice is absolutely shot, so hearing him sing is like hearing Cookie Monster in drag trying to be a rock singer. The last piece is the flat bass playing. Eddie brought Wolfie in simply because he is his son, not because he has the chops to actually be Van Halen's bass player. He is not Michael Anthony, and he never will be. The last thing that NEEDS to be mentioned is the background vocals and harmonies that were a key component of EVERY Van Halen record from 1978 to 1998. Whoever was singing lead always had Eddie and Mikey singing background vocals, and they were a classic duet that was beloved by fans. ADKOT is missing that key component, which just drives the last nail in the coffin that this record should have never been recorded. If you don't believe me, give the album a listen for yourself. You'll want to shoot yourself in the head before "Tattoo" is on it's second verse. (For those of you who are too wise to not bother looking the record up, "Tattoo" is the first track.)

Synic's Final Word
Okay, we've come a long way to get to this point. Over 42 years, to be more precise. As I said in the beginning, I hate being asked "Van Halen or Van Hagar?" because the reality is that Van Halen had 3 singers. And no matter who was singing in the band, I was a fan. Roth, Hagar, and Cherone all gave us plenty of material to listen to. Most of it was great, some of it wasn't so great, but every band is that way. There is no band out there that wrote nothing but killer tracks. Even you biased Beatles and Zeppelin fans can admit that.

But here it is: my final word.

Roth had showmanship and strong lyrics, but he couldn't sing and often forgets lyrics.

Hagar had guitar chops, could sing and perform, but couldn't write strong lyrics like Dave. He often gets blamed for the keyboards and love songs change, but that is not entirely his fault.

Cherone was the "best of both worlds." (heh, heh.) He could sing, write, perform, etc. etc. He just wasn't given a fair shot.

When the COVID quarantine is over and you're looking to buy concert tickets, look for Sam or Gary. Don't waste your time or your money on Dave. Crawl out of your parents' basement and acknowledge it's not 1984 anymore. I love Dave too, but it's time to move on. Full disclosure I might be writing a tad hypocritically here, as if Dave came close I would probably go see him. As long as he wasn't opening for KISS anymore... So go see whoever you wanna see, but for Van Halen hits performed the way they sounded back in the 80s, see Sam. You'll be much happier. And for the love of God, acknowledge that there ARE 3 singers for Van Halen, and give them all a fair shot. It's all good shit, and there's no need to insult others and spread hate on Twitter because you think "Panama" is better than "Poundcake." Just be glad they both exist.

Personal favorites:

ROTH
1. Runnin' With The Devil
2. I'm The One
3. Ice Cream Man
4. Light Up The Sky
5. Somebody Get Me A Doctor
6. Where Have All The Good Times Gone
7. Little Guitars
8. Mean Street
9. Hear About It Later
10. Unchained
11. Panama

HAGAR
1. Good Enough
2. 5150
3. Dreams
4. Mine All Mine
5. Finish What Ya Started
6. Poundcake
7. Judgement Day
8. Spanked
9. Seventh Seal
10. Don't Tell Me (What Love Can Do)
11. Feelin'

CHERONE
1. Without You
2. One I Want
3. From Afar
4. Dirty Water Dog
5. Fire In The Hole
6. Why Can't This Be Love (Live 1998)

So who is my all-time favorite singer in Van Halen? That's easy.

Michael Anthony.

Tuesday, May 19, 2020

Synic's Spotlight: The Life I Remember - Once Human

Buckle up ladies and gentlemen, because tonight the spotlight shines on. Tonight is not another punk band like you may be expecting, though. Tonight I wanted to come up with something a little different to fill your earholes. So tonight I give you something harder, and a little more abrasive. Tonight I give you, Once Human.

Once Human came onto my radar not long ago, during my internet research of female-fronted metal bands to give my musical palette some femininity. I found exactly that in a couple groups, but not this one. Once Human is unlike anything I've listened to before, but let me say they are a warm welcome in my library. Their 2015 debut record The Life I Remember has been a regular shuffle in my daily listens for a couple months now, and it's showing no signs of slowing down.

When I first started getting into metal, I was never into the screamers. To me, that's all it was. Aurally abrasive and altogether displeasing. It was just screaming to me. I couldn't understand what the vocalist was saying, nor did I care. It came to be known to me by the sub-genre moniker that my sister came up with herself: Cookie Monster Rock. Its like your standard hard rock/metal, with an angry Cookie Monster holding the microphone. That said, something changed within me the moment I discovered Once Human.

The insane musical talent of the guys in this band just blew me away. The vocalist can hold a note with the best of them, especially on tracks like "I Am War" and "The Life I Remember," but sometimes you just have to scream it out. And that is also something she excels at, on near every track on the record. Minus the musical interludes, of course. (It also doesn't hurt that she is incredibly hot, but I'm not Revolver Magazine, so I won't rate my bands by the hotness of the lead singer.) What I will, say, however, is that while my progress of learning the lyrics to their songs is greatly impeded by the fact that she is indeed screaming, it is not impeding my enjoyment of their material in the slightest. There's something charming and deeply thrilling about being able to shut the world off and just bang your fuckin head for a while, and Once Human lets me do exactly that.

Once Hman - The Life I Remember - Amazon.com Music

The Life I Remember - Once Human
9 - 4 - 2015

1. Trail of Tears
2. Ground Zero
3. You C**t
4. Pick Your Poison
5. Terminal
6. Demoneyes
7. Devil Can Have You
8. Time of the Disease
9. I Am War
10. The Life I Remember
11. Siren
12. Growing Colder

Favorite Track: You C**t
Least Favorite Track: I Am War