Monday, May 25, 2020

The Mighty Van Halen Debate - Synic's Final Word

It has certainly come out to my readers by now that I love Van Halen. They're a band that transformed arena-rock, inspired countless glam-metal bands, and they continue to inspire to this day. It's no secret to my family and friends that I love talking about all things Van Halen, but the one question I hate being asked is "Van Halen or Van Hagar?" It drives me crazy that every day my Twitter feed is flooded with Roth fans shitting on Hagar, or Hagar fans shitting on Dave. The reality of the situation is, "Van Hagar" never existed. It is just the annoying and demeaning moniker that some so-called "fans" of the group gave the band after Diamond Dave left to pursue his solo career. One of the questions I WISH people would ask me is, "How do you feel about Van Cherone?" I bet many of you don't even know what I'm talking about. That's because Van Halen 3 is one of the most forgotten-about records in rock and roll history. Many current fans don't even realize that there was in fact a third singer for Van Halen in the late 90s. So when people ask me if I'm a Sammy or Dave fan, I tell them this: I'm a VAN HALEN fan. 3 singers, 3 sounds, 1 band. I'm a fan of all of it. Any time Eddie, Alex, and Mikey put new grooves in a vinyl disk, I was a buyer and a fan. In this breakdown, I'll talk about the strengths and weaknesses of each era of Van Halen, and give my final remarks at the end. So strap in and get ready.

Van Halen Phase 1: The Roth Years
Van Halen Phase 1 is some of the strongest, most inspirational, most inventive, most recognizable material in rock and roll. The list of hits is seemingly endless. The band's only #1 hit "Jump" would also come from the last of 6 records during this era. I could go on for a long time about the greatness of their debut record, or you can refer to my earlier post comparing Van Halen to Appetite for Destruction for my full analysis.

The first six records from Van Halen are a true treasure. Eddie Van Halen forever changed the guitar world with his incredible skill and unique techniques. The band's frontman, David Lee Roth, would become a rock icon. Not for his incredible voice, but rather his unforgettable showmanship. He was the perfect frontman, the girls in the crowd wanted him, and the boys wanted to BE him. What Roth had in showmanship, however, he lacked in talent. He could run, jump, and dance on stage like no one else, but he couldn't sing. In fact, early in the backyard party days of Van Halen, the brothers Eddie and Alex didn't even want Dave in the band because he sounded so bad. He could only sort of play guitar, but he couldn't sing. What he could do, however, was write great lyrics. (He also had a PA system that the boys desperately needed, as Dave came from a rich family and the brothers came from an immigrant family...) Another shortcoming Dave had was actually with his brilliant lyrics. On stage, he would often forget them. While he may play it off like a big joke, it's insanely unprofessional and the fans don't appreciate that.

So, in short, Dave could perform, and he could write. But he can't sing, and he can't remember his own lyrics.

Van Halen Phase 2: The Hagar Years
This era of Van Halen is easily the second-most talked about tenure for the band. And why shouldn't it be? They put out a string of hits, all on 4 records, each hitting #1 on the charts. It was a massively successful time for the group, even though many Roth fans would hate to admit it. When the Red Rocker stepped into the group, it was like a match made in heaven. In fact, the pairing had been in the works, more or less, since the beginning. Eddie and Alex were big fans of the Hagar-fronted band Montrose, and while they were recording their debut record, they handed producer Ted Templeman a copy of Montrose's debut record and said "Make us sound like this." There is even an audio recording out there somewhere of Van Halen (with Roth) covering a Montrose song at one of their famous backyard parties. Later on in Phase 1, Templeman tried convincing the brothers VH that Roth was holding them back, and they should give Sammy a call. Montrose had broken up, and Sammy was out on his own. It sounded good, but the time wasn't right.

When Sammy finally came in, after getting his car fixed by Eddie's mechanic, it was the pairing everyone had been waiting for. Sam could do it all, he could write, sing, perform, and he could play the hell out of a guitar. Just imagine, a guitar-focused band like Van Halen with dueling guitars. Guitar-God Eddie facing off with the newcomer Red Rocker. Would've been amazing. And was it? Well, yes, but not for the reason we were hoping for. Come mid-to-late 80s, Eddie discovered the keyboards, and began experimenting and writing with 88 keys instead of 6 strings. This transition to keys caused Van Halen with Sammy Hagar to start generating hits that were all focused on sex and love, which made many fans believe that Van Halen were getting soft, while others continued to love the new material. The change in tone of the band cause many fans to leave, and many new fans to come in, after all, Hagar had his own fanbase that he brought with him after his successful time with Montrose and massively successful stretch as a solo artist. For many years, Van Halen with Sammy would play some of his solo hits, such as "I Can't Drive 55" and "One Way to Rock" at their live shows. He would also include a solo acoustic performance of either "Give To Live" or "Eagles Fly."

With Hagar, the band found themselves a guy who could actually sing. His lyrics were a little weaker, and the band lost their edgy attitude, but that may not be entirely Sam's fault. He wrote and sang along with the music he was given, it's not his fault if Guitar-God Eddie wanted to play keyboards instead.

Van Halen Phase 3: Cherone and The Beginning of The End
I couldn't exactly call this The Cherone Years, as he was only with the group for one album, so this section will be the longest, but theres a lot of shit to cover here.

Somewhere around '96-'97 marked the unfortunate end of the Hagar run of Van Halen. Whether you believe Eddie or Sammy as to how the ending came to be, if he was fired or if he quit, is merely inconsequential. At the end of the day, Sam was gone, but Van Halen wanted to keep going. They needed a new singer. Roth and Hagar were both out of the picture, so they needed someone new.

Enter Gary Cherone.

Van Halen only recorded 1 record with Gary, and it is easily one of the most ignored records in rock and roll. But why? It doesn't deserve that at all. It came at a bad time, maybe, as rock and roll was struggling in the late 90s. Glam-metal was long dead, grunge was still somewhat big, and many of the big-name acts from the 70s and 80s were having a hard time with the late 90s and early 00s. Van Halen were no different. Van Halen 3 came in 1998, and a massive world tour followed. Was is successful? No. Should it have been? Yes. Here's why: Cherone had everything the band needed. He could perform, he could write, and he could sing. The setlist from their '98 tour was stacked with hits from all 3 phases of the band. He sand the hell out of Roth tunes "Mean Street," "Unchained," and more, and he nailed them. He hit Hagar favorites such as "Right Now," and "Why Can't This Be Love," and nailed those too. Then of course he sang his own material, like "Without You," and "Fire in the Hole" and naturally knocked them out of the park. The sad truth of it is, by this point, no one cared. After 2 beloved frontmen left the band, no one wanted a third. I feel bad for Gary Cherone for this reason. VH3 was, in the brother's eyes, a failure. After the string of #1 albums they had just celebrated, VH3 fell tragically short. But what I will say, is that the failure of VH3 is not Gary's fault. It was a great rock record. Maybe it wasn't a great Van Halen record, but it was a great rock record nonetheless. Maybe had the band toured with Gary before the record came out, things would have been different. It's hard to say.

To boil it down, I love Gary Cherone. He was the best possible choice for a doomed Van Halen in the late 90s. He could write, sing, and perform, and that was exactly what they needed to stay afloat. Sadly, the VH goose was cooked before Gary even stepped in.

This officially marks the end of all listenable material to come from Van Halen. It is my belief that Van Halen committed suicide in 1999 in their home in California. Maybe they couldn't handle the pressure of finding a 4th singer, maybe they were afraid of Y2K. I don't know for sure, I just know that it was over before the change of the century.

Since Gary left the band, they had done reunions with both Dave and Sam, generated 2 greatest hits packages, (both of which contain no Cherone songs whatsoever) and recorded some new songs with each of the first two frontmen. Dave came in for "Me Wise Magic" and "Can't Get This Stuff No More," which are two songs that many fans actually seem to like, though I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because many Dave fans are too stubborn to admit that he sucks now? I don't know. I bet that if Sam or Gary sang these songs instead, no one would like them at all. Think about it. The truth is, Dave sings like absolute shit on these tracks. When he tries to hit that signature squeal that he always did on early records, he sounds like a cat that was hit by a lawnmower. Hang it up, Dave. It's embarrassing.

Sam came in to record "Up For Breakfast," "It's About Time," and "Learning To See," all of which are absolutely awful. I will admit, I know all the words to "Breakfast" because I thought it was catchy and fun when I first heard it, but after the 3rd or 4th time of hearing Sam sing about morning wood and getting off first thing after waking up, I got pretty tired of it. Like I said before, he couldn't write like Dave could. His metaphors are just weak and he makes the same ones over and over again. Love you Sam, but not for these 3 songs.

Finally, Dave came back in for the new record that no one asked for. A Different Kind of Truth landed in 2012 with David Lee Roth on vocals, and Eddie Van Halen's son Wolfgang on bass guitar. I will now say that this is the only Van Halen record that I refuse to listen to. It's simply just awful. Truly unforgivably awful. It contains recycled riffs from the early 80s, meaning the guitarwork and drums are the only listenable components of this record. Dave's lyrics are tragically weak, and his lyrics were always his strength. (He also can't dance or perform live like he used to, so seeing their live show just isn't the same anymore either.) His voice is absolutely shot, so hearing him sing is like hearing Cookie Monster in drag trying to be a rock singer. The last piece is the flat bass playing. Eddie brought Wolfie in simply because he is his son, not because he has the chops to actually be Van Halen's bass player. He is not Michael Anthony, and he never will be. The last thing that NEEDS to be mentioned is the background vocals and harmonies that were a key component of EVERY Van Halen record from 1978 to 1998. Whoever was singing lead always had Eddie and Mikey singing background vocals, and they were a classic duet that was beloved by fans. ADKOT is missing that key component, which just drives the last nail in the coffin that this record should have never been recorded. If you don't believe me, give the album a listen for yourself. You'll want to shoot yourself in the head before "Tattoo" is on it's second verse. (For those of you who are too wise to not bother looking the record up, "Tattoo" is the first track.)

Synic's Final Word
Okay, we've come a long way to get to this point. Over 42 years, to be more precise. As I said in the beginning, I hate being asked "Van Halen or Van Hagar?" because the reality is that Van Halen had 3 singers. And no matter who was singing in the band, I was a fan. Roth, Hagar, and Cherone all gave us plenty of material to listen to. Most of it was great, some of it wasn't so great, but every band is that way. There is no band out there that wrote nothing but killer tracks. Even you biased Beatles and Zeppelin fans can admit that.

But here it is: my final word.

Roth had showmanship and strong lyrics, but he couldn't sing and often forgets lyrics.

Hagar had guitar chops, could sing and perform, but couldn't write strong lyrics like Dave. He often gets blamed for the keyboards and love songs change, but that is not entirely his fault.

Cherone was the "best of both worlds." (heh, heh.) He could sing, write, perform, etc. etc. He just wasn't given a fair shot.

When the COVID quarantine is over and you're looking to buy concert tickets, look for Sam or Gary. Don't waste your time or your money on Dave. Crawl out of your parents' basement and acknowledge it's not 1984 anymore. I love Dave too, but it's time to move on. Full disclosure I might be writing a tad hypocritically here, as if Dave came close I would probably go see him. As long as he wasn't opening for KISS anymore... So go see whoever you wanna see, but for Van Halen hits performed the way they sounded back in the 80s, see Sam. You'll be much happier. And for the love of God, acknowledge that there ARE 3 singers for Van Halen, and give them all a fair shot. It's all good shit, and there's no need to insult others and spread hate on Twitter because you think "Panama" is better than "Poundcake." Just be glad they both exist.

Personal favorites:

ROTH
1. Runnin' With The Devil
2. I'm The One
3. Ice Cream Man
4. Light Up The Sky
5. Somebody Get Me A Doctor
6. Where Have All The Good Times Gone
7. Little Guitars
8. Mean Street
9. Hear About It Later
10. Unchained
11. Panama

HAGAR
1. Good Enough
2. 5150
3. Dreams
4. Mine All Mine
5. Finish What Ya Started
6. Poundcake
7. Judgement Day
8. Spanked
9. Seventh Seal
10. Don't Tell Me (What Love Can Do)
11. Feelin'

CHERONE
1. Without You
2. One I Want
3. From Afar
4. Dirty Water Dog
5. Fire In The Hole
6. Why Can't This Be Love (Live 1998)

So who is my all-time favorite singer in Van Halen? That's easy.

Michael Anthony.

2 comments:

  1. Thanks for the hilarious and informative post for Van Halen amateurs like myself. I will say, the first time I listened to VH3, I had a fucking amazing time.

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    1. Thanks for reading. Glad someone else enjoys the record as much as I do. You know what they say, good things always come in 3's ;)

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